FROM: mayor.shelect@transition2025.com


Dear New Yorkers Far and Wide,

You know just as well as me that this campaign trail has been long and hard. ;)

Together we enter a fierce new chapter in our city's herstory. You knocked on thousands of doors and demanded my transition. Now, as the city comes together to guide me through this brave transformation, let us take a moment to reflect on what's to cum:

  ☭ Matcha lines are the new bread lines. The grass has never been greener!

  ☭ The DSNY is sexy now. Did someone order a dump truck?

  ☭ The Rat Czar has been promoted to City Comptroller. That’s right: everybody gets just a little bit of cheese.

  ☭ All ride share apps have been replaced with camels. No more windows baby—light up that cigarette!

  ☭ All work is sex work. Affair at the office? It's in the role description, honey!

On the first day of this administration, please join us in celebrating this historic transition at our Brownsville campaign headquarters.

And never forget my promise: To be a woman by the people, for the people.



TOE THE PARTY LINE:
Socialist Realness; PLURtocracy Now!; In Shakira Law, Every Day Must Be A Tea; Burqini Statue of Liberty; Che Guevarx Tshirt Dress; TJ Marxxinista; Peoples Cummissars; City-Run Doll Beef; Global Left Nepo Baby (non-derogatory); Aunties International; Campaign Merch Couture; Union Trades; Podcaster but Cunt; Jacobin Chic; Cuomintern Fish; Sliwa Boots; Gender-Affirming Berets; Chopped for not bringing a woman to daycare; Serving fierce soup at the table of success; “is the Tashkent of America”; New Regime, New You!; Sexyy Redscare; Gulag Archipelago (S.I.); Gracie Mansion on Sniffies; Free Bus But There’s Still a Dookie on It; Socialized Sewer; Democratized Afties; Universal Basic Cum Dump; Wages For Topwork; Clock the Rich; Tax the Clout; Slash the Rent; and Slurrr the Means of Production.


GAYORAL TRANSITION TEAM:

MATERIAL REDISTRIBUTION HANGAR COMMITTEA

• 01-04: Ayesha (Brooklyn, NY)
• 04-06: TYGAPAW (Brooklyn, NY)
• 06-09: Jay Denham (Kalamazoo, MI)
• 09-12: Ambivalent (Brooklyn, NY)
• 12-cls: Juliana Huxtable B2B Michael Magnan (Brooklyn, NY)

• 01-04: EscaFlowne (Brooklyn, NY)
• 04-07: Shyboi B2B False Witness (Brooklyn, NY)
• 07-10: Patrick Russell (Brooklyn, NY)
• 10-1: Lauren Flax (Brooklyn, NY)
• 1-cls: BMG (Detroit, MI)

• Things to bring to ZC Red New York: a fabulous look, an immaculate vibe, a strong sense of camaraderie, and maybe a snack for yourself and our staff.
• There will be no photography or video inside the building, we're so serious, you WILL get kicked out; you may snap photos of the beautiful Brownsville vistas in our yard.

• Doors and access to ZC Red New York will never close; you may come at any time. Entry will be free after 1pm, pending door rules.
• Re-entry is always allowed; however, you will now need to re-join the TICKETS LINE to re-enter instead of barging through the door in front of everyone.
• Further, door beatings will continue until the morale improves... No, JK. We feel terrible about people standing in line for anything longer than 10 minutes and have collectively (!) worked out a new door plan that should speed things up. We require you to understand this plan in advance (click image to engorge):
  
  
  
  
• New door flow will separate WALK-UPS from TICKET-HOLDERS and funnel them to different door staffers: TICKET-HOLDERS on the right and WALK-UPS on the left.
• If your entire group is TICKET-HOLDERS, you're ALL TICKET-HOLDERS; line up to the right.
• If there are people with and without tickets in your group, you're ALL WALK-UPS; line up to the left.
• We're adding a new "WOMEN ONLY" discounted ticketing tier; it is meant to encourage women to come to ZC together instead of having to rely on being asked by the gheys. That means that there should be ONLY WOMEN in your WOMEN-ONLY TICKETED GROUP (of at least 2). Men are not allowed to purchase these tickets, either—all violators will be chopped, with refunds.
• DONOR TICKET-HOLDERS get to skip the TICKET LINE by approaching the DOOR MANAGER, not the ticket or walk-up staffers; thank you for your support and but please do not act entitled at the door—be polite and patient like.
• DONOR TICKETS are released first, then BIPOC, then MAIN TIERS along with WOMEN-ONLY and 7AM and 9AM entry tiers.